Casio’s Cybersecurity Slip-Up: When Calculators Meet Catastrophe

In a move that would make a digital clock blush, electronics titan Casio—yes, the same company that brought you the calculator watch and the soundtrack to your high school algebra anxiety—has officially fessed up to a tiny little oopsie. Turns out, their cybersecurity measures were about as robust as a jellyfish's spine, resulting in a ransomware attack that leaked a staggering amount of sensitive data. Because nothing screams “technological innovation” like leaving the backdoor open for hackers.

The incident unfolded in October 2024 when the Underground ransomware group decided to channel their inner Robin Hood—only instead of stealing from the rich to give to the poor, they simply stole from the rich to post it all online. The group allegedly made off with 204.9 GB of Casio’s secrets. That’s the equivalent of roughly 68 million digitized abacuses, for anyone keeping track.

The Great Data Dump

So, what’s in the leak? Oh, just a casual buffet of personal information. Over 6,400 Casio employees, along with customers, business partners, and even some poor saps who merely interviewed for jobs, had their data splashed across the web.

Highlights include:

Human resources data for 5,509 employees, featuring riveting details like employee numbers and affiliations. (Move over, Netflix.)
Full family names and addresses for 97 domestic employees. Think of it as LinkedIn, but with stalker-friendly features!
Biographical data for nine unlucky individuals who almost joined Casio but are now doubly glad they didn’t.

Fortunately, Casio was quick to clarify that no credit card data was compromised. So while your identity may be on the dark web, at least your coffee budget is safe.

The Ransom Refusal

Casio also proudly announced they refused to give in to the ransomware gang's “unreasonable demands,” a bold move akin to refusing to pay for your broken car window while the thief drives off in your car.

Meanwhile, the attackers were so brazen they didn’t just steal the data—they published it on their leak site like it was the latest edition of Hackers Quarterly. Because nothing says “professional” like a ransomware group with their own blog.

Spam-tacular Aftermath

Following the breach, Casio employees began receiving spam emails. Nothing says “company loyalty” like watching your inbox fill up with offers for dodgy miracle diets and investments in cryptocurrency schemes.

Casio’s Mea Culpa

In their statement, Casio admitted to “security failings” that prevented them from countering the attack, which is corporate-speak for “we got absolutely roasted.” They’ve since teamed up with cybersecurity experts to “strengthen security across the entire group.” One can only hope this involves something more advanced than changing their Wi-Fi password to “Password123.”

A Lesson in Irony

Let’s take a moment to appreciate the poetic irony here. This is Casio, a company that has spent decades perfecting gadgets designed to prevent human error—calculators, watches, and keyboards—and yet, when it comes to protecting their own digital vault, they might as well have handed the keys to the hackers and said, “Don’t forget to water the plants.”

Final Thoughts

Casio, we thank you for your contributions to electronics and unintentional comedy. The calculators are great, the keyboards are iconic, and this data breach? Truly the stuff of cyber-security textbooks. In the meantime, we eagerly await your next product: a watch that doubles as a firewall.

Stay secure, everyone. Or at least try harder than Casio did.